Lessons

Thanksgiving break really turned out to be more of an eye-opener than I expected.

Actually, I'm not really sure what I was expecting when I went home. I think that I definitely painted myself a very rosy picture of what I wanted everything to be like for the five days that I spent there, but that ended up being totally unrealistic as the week drug on and I found myself longing to return to Iowa City.

A lot of wounds were reopened this week, and it hurts. Especially after the healing process that God has put me through over the past month. But as a good friend of mine told me this morning, "you make the choice to keep moving forward... lean to God."

Those are such simple, yet wise words. It's just another choice, isn't it?

However, I'm happy that I went through the pain of going home with week because it helped me work on so many important "faith lessons"...

- Self-Conviction. This is never something that I've struggled with, it's just something that I've always thought was unimportant, but it really isn't. The ability to identify my own sins is far more important than being able to identify anyone else's.
- Perseverance. Back in September, I was pleading to God to clear up the tremendous stress in my life. Crying. Begging. Everything that I could possibly do. Three months later, I understand that there was a purpose for all of it.
- Forgiveness. This is by far the most difficult one. God makes it look so easy... but it's really not, because I'm a human and I so badly want to retaliate when I'm wronged. But I won't.

A rather troublesome week was closed off by one of the most fantastic Saturdays that I've ever had. I got paid 50 bucks to go to two sporting events, enjoyed some much-needed alone time in my dorm room, and talked with my best friend for nearly two hours before going to sleep. I also experienced my first wrestling meet at Carver Hawkeye with a few good friends whilst enjoying a nice little concoction of Coca Cola and... something else...

Oops, did I say that? :)


Tomorrow is December 1st. This means that I am only 19 days away from completing my first semester at the University of Iowa. Do you know what the sad part of this is? I don't want to wait another month to return. I wish that I could come home briefly for Christmas, enjoy the company of my family and a few good friends, enjoy three days on a (warm) bowl trip, and then return to Iowa City for the spring.

Alas, that is not how it works... but I am hopeful that God has great things in store for my month at home for Christmas break. Because even though this past week was rough, it strengthened me in a way that I didn't really expect it too.

It's funny...

God never uses obvious scenarios to strengthen us, does He? It's always those random curveballs that sometimes smack you in the stomach...